When we know ourselves, we are less likely to be manipulated and controlled because we aren’t moved by our fears, shame or grief becoming activated. We know all of our triggers, where they come from and know how to sooth ourselves through it.

The first step is to learn to take a comfortable seat inside our own minds and bodies. Connect with a practice of tuning in - meditation, therapy, yoga, art, running, etc. This does not mean learning to be happy about what is inside. Quite the opposite. It’s about becoming at ease with the feeling the terror, shame, grief, uncertainty, etc. It’s about practicing a relationship with all of the internal dialogue from a loving and compassionate center seat in order to live a more fearless and honest life, connected to our natural being.

Secondly, when we stop avoiding the pain and grief inside ourselves, then we can stop avoiding the pain and grief in our world. The manufactured bite sized stories start to taste too sugary and we crave something more complex and developed. Something closer to truth. Learn to tune in when you are looking outward and pay attention to behavioral habits and body signals as you take in the world. These are trailheads to knowing more about yourself.

Lastly, learn to connect to others who are doing the same wake up call from within. Support each other and encourage each other so you remember that you are not alone in the work. We then can create a practice of knowing others, just as they are. We can detect when people are being vulnerable and accountable to their own work. Collectively, we can unshackle ourselves from the harmful stories that oppress us all and refuse anything less than honesty and compassion.